Category Archives: School

Relentless

What is the one thing in your life that your will stop at nothing to get/be/do?  
That one thing that you will never stop striving to have.  
That one thing that would fulfill a part of your soul that nothing else could.  
That one thing you stay up and think about at night.
 That one thing that you talk to yourself about.
That one thing for me is my degree.
It may sounds silly, but it is totally true and I’ll tell you why:
I graduated from high school in 2000 (yep, I’m almost the big three zero).  
And what year is it again… 2012?  
I went straight to college and lasted (not even) a full semester.  It was a confusing experience, and one I am not extremely proud of.  Sure, I didn’t do what I set out to do, and blah blah blah.  But what mattered to me in the years to follow was that I let down some of the people that supported me.  It was a horrible feeling, and one that I was not equipped to handle on an emotionally mature level at that point in my life.

So what did I do?
I rebelled.  I partied, and I partied hard. (something I did almost none of in grade school).
I came out of the proverbial cage like a bat out of hell, and I avoided responsibility like the plague.

For almost four years I worked in and out of ordinary restaurants, had a few near death experiences, drank WAY too much, and gave my parents a few extra (thousand) gray hairs.

Finally, in 2004, tired of running myself ragged and having nothing to show for it, I made a serious decision to go back to school.  With the help of my family, I stared at a community college where I would spend the next two years busting my ass before transferring to a university with a 3.8 GPA.  Yeah… I was serious about  it this time.

After 3 successful semesters at George Mason University, Bren and I found out we were expecting a baby.   Needless to say, this put an immediate halt on the ol’ education.  I took two full semesters off of school.  I cannot tell you how upset I was about having to stop taking classes.  I was thrilled about having a baby, but depressed about the changes it was going to force me to make.  (I have to laugh at that now… “changes.”  Yeah… a baby changes EVERYTHING). I swore that I would go back as soon as I could.  Bren promised to do everything in his power to help me do so.
About 3 months after I had Liam, I landed a full time gig at George Mason University (how convenient you say!), and began taking classes again soon after.  Luckily for me, GMU offers its employees tuition benefits.  This allowed me to take 2 courses per semester (which was all I could handle anyway having a newborn at home and all…). 
 Four years and two kids later (Liam and Collin), here I am: On the cusp of my last semester.  About to graduate in about 7 months.  Working full time.  Planning crazy birthday parties last minute.  Trying to do this blogging thing (which I love and wish I had more time and energy for).  
I cannot begin to tell you what getting my degree signifies for me.  
Strength.  Support.  Faith.  Determination.  Focus.  Creativity.  Passion.  Hope.  Drive.  Comfort.  Relief.  Relentlessness.    
Most of all, I know, that if I can do THIS… I can do anything.
Never give up on that one thing.  It will be yours sooner than you expect!
Kindly~

Meghan
 
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On my mind this Monday

My hub is on my mind today, like most days.  I hope to get a second to tell him how much he means to me.  I try to tell him everyday, in one way or another.  A text, a kiss, a hug… an actual “thank you.”  I feel a date night brewing.  Date nights are SO important for any couple, but especially a mom/dad couple.  Nights away from the babe are critical in order to plug some romance, some spontaneity back into the connection.  What if, just for tonight, we weren’t co-parents? We were co-people? You be a man. I’ll be a woman. That’s all.
My boy is ALWAYS on my mind, but especially recently.  The poor thing is going through a awful phase right now… I think they call it the ‘terrible two’s.’  There has been no hitting or kicking.  No throwing or spitting.  No screaming or tantrums.  None of the things {I thought} were classified under the term ‘terrible two’s.’  Instead, Bubba is an emotional wreck.  He has always been a VERY sensitive child (much like I was and am ;)), but lately, all he wants to/can do is cry.  And it has me totally lost/heartbroken, frustrated/drained.  I suppose this is a natural thing for both child and parent.  It’s a test of the relationship, and it will only increase understanding and togetherness (at least that is my hope).  But in the midst of it, I’m feeling overwhelmed.  I turned to my wonderful mom, Karen, for support, and she simply told me: “Just love him.”

Yeah…. she’s pretty great!

School!  I came into work today to find out that I Aced this semester to the tune of a 3.85 GPA.  Good enough (I think) to keep me on the Dean’s List.  And so, yeah, this makes me happy.  Being an almost 30 something with a husband and kid at home (I would say family, but husband and kid sounds a little more daunting, doesn’t it?!), it has not been easy to keep up with my degree.  But I am working off of sheer will-power here, people.  Pure gusto.  Earning my degree falls in line right below my family on my list of priorities.  Sorry work, you didn’t make the cut… even though I need you.  Okay, so I’ll give work #3 on my list of importance/daily attention…
Finally, and last but NOT least, my Aunt Rosie, who is my Great Aunt (both generationally and complimentary) is heavy on my mind and in my heart. She has been in a nursing home for 5-or-so-years now, and had a stroke last week.  This was not her first stroke, but thankfully, it will be her last.  Her closest family members (my Great Uncle Lloyd and her sons, Larry and Irvin) decided to take her off meds, oxygen, and food, and simply let her pass.  She made it clear that this is what she wanted.  She has said for years now that she was “ready to go,” but her body just wouldn’t give up on her.  I was able to see her yesterday.  I was able to tell her how much I love her, how much she has always meant and will always mean to me, and I was able to kiss her goodbye.  I’m so thankful for that opportunity.  And I am begging the powers-that-be to take her peacefully, gently and soon.
It is so important to stay close to those special people in your life.  To tell those whom bring you joy just that; that they make you happy.  It is important to live in love rather than try to impose your love upon others.  Let the way in which you carry yourself speak louder than words ever could.  And lastly, look in the mirror and get to know yourself.  It begins and ends with you….

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